No job title to my name.

these days
life moves in cycles
of positivity– wonder,
a certain hope
(jealousy, sometimes)
something close
to desperation
and unassuming happiness

I write answers
to testing questions
wonder if it’s all for nothing
study my keyboard
listen to lectures
consider all the possibilities
arrive at meaningless conclusions
quietly dance with the darkness I used to know
only to come back because there’s nothing there.
How many others have felt like this?

I question the value
of my existence
without a job title
to my name.